The only man I know who behaves
sensibly is my tailor; he takes my measurements anew each time he sees me. The
rest go on with their old measurements and expect me to fit them.
George
Bernard Shaw
Not everyone takes the time or
spends the money to have their clothing tailor fitted. They assume that
something off the rack, when bought in the proper size, should fit them well
enough. And that’s where our most common life problem rears its ugly head, as
we assume that “well enough” is good enough to make it work.
There are about 2.25 billion adult
men in the world, yet we assume that they can be broken down into about 4
different body sizes. We think that, just because it’s our “size,” it will fit
just like the catalog picture. And when it doesn’t, we blame the magazine for
false advertisement. What if the problem isn’t that the magazine lied, but
rather the magazine took the time to fit it properly to the model in the image?
Most catalog clothing is actually tailored to the specific model so it fits
perfectly as anyone in the marketing world knows “well enough” doesn’t really
cut it.
The same thing does on for
everything within this life. We read an article about how to better your life
or take some advice on how to become a better man, expecting to receive the
promised results. When these outcomes don’t pan out as expected, we dismiss the
entirety of the information as useless. We assume that information is created
as a black and white guideline format, where one size fits all, and the end
results will work “well enough” for us.
“Well enough” is never good enough
to make a difference in our lives.
Not everyone will get the same results
from the same instructions. The first thing you need to do is understand who
you are at that moment within your life. Unless you recognize who you are and
know what you want, you are going to be left stranded trying to figure out why
you can’t seem to become a better person. Without that knowledge, you will
simply assume you are broken beyond repair and left confused as to why things
work out for someone else, yet won’t for you.
After you have taken your current “measurements”,
now you have to learn to listen to the advice given. We have to listen to
others, but we must tailor their lessons to fit who we are. To do that, we must
understand how we must tailor these lessons to fit us, and not the other way
around. You have to learn to listen, to learn what to absorb, what to adjust,
and what to ignore. Their lessons only work for us if we can first understand
why the lesson worked for them and we can understand how to make those lessons
work of us.
You need to stop trying to fit
yourself into the “better man” suit created by someone else. Instead, focus on
growing into a better person, one defined by you, as you work with what works
for you. Take that “better man” suit and tailor it to who you are. Learn to
sift through all the comments, to deconstruct every article, and search for
those tidbits that give value to you.
By this time you need to realize how
you can’t pick and choose what’s convenient, but rather what’s necessary. When
you are honest about whom you are you can be honest about what you need. You
stop living a life of convenient comfort, but strive to become better every
day. You become your own tailor, as you use the lessons of others to your personalized
benefit. Create the idealized “better man” suit that fits you. Now you can stop
trying to fit in the ideals of others, but instead work to fit into your ideal
you.
