Rethinking Stories About Chivalry and Princesses

Since it is so likely that children will meet cruel enemies, let them at least have heard of brave knights and heroic courage.

C.S. Lewis

As many of our traditions are born from the old heroic stories, I thought it would be appropriate to look at one of the biggest misconceptions there is with these stories, the idea of “saving the princess.”

To understand this, we must first consider why we even have these stories. Story telling traditions were a way to both entertain and teach life lessons. This was an important part of the old Roman society as stories were used to promote social responsibility, heroism, discipline, and the idea that every man had the capacity to change the world into something better, no matter his origin (as long as he was a roman citizen). Think of it as an old version of TV if TV understood its social responsibility. Why do I give emphasis on the Romans and not the Greeks? Because most of our Greek legacy comes filtered by the Roman expansion and many of our military and social traditions are in many ways remnants of the old Roman Empire.

But so often, part of the story relies on the idea that the hero would go out to do something heroic and as a prize, we would end up with the girl. That is, well, sexist as hell as it reduces women to simply a prize to be won. But what if we are viewing the stories wrong?

In many of the old stories, the hero didn’t go off to save the queen for himself. He actually went on a mission for the king who couldn’t abandon the throne; leaving behind his own loved one to achieve a greater good for his country. We see this in stories like Saint George and the Dragon. Even then, some of these stories warn of the danger of the Hero getting any selfish ideas with the queen, as we see in Lancelot and Queen Guinevere.

Other stories are about contests for the princess's hand in marriage, as virtue and courage will usually trump social standing. We might assume that at this point, the princess was basically raffled off as a trophy, but in reality the contests were to chose who would be the king’s successor. Marring the princess was because royal lineage was passed down by the Queen and not the King. The King might have been the king, but it was the Queen’s children who inherited the thrown. Many Kings would be quite liberal where they deposited their seed so following that road was hard to prove. But again, why so much emphasis to proving yourself to the Queen or the Princess? The answer is as rather interesting mix of religion, language, and real estate.  

The land has always been viewed as female. It’s the barer of fruits and caregiver of the people. This is why we call it “Mother Earth.” That is why there is such an importance to female spirituality within our old traditions. Whoever owned the most fertile lands would usually have the most prosperous kingdom. Land was power.

And to reinforce the idea of femininity within a land, the word used to define your motherland within Latin traditions is the feminine word Patria (Motherland). Although originating from the masculine Patrius-A-Um (relating to the Father or Forefathers), it took a feminine connotation when it evolved into the Italian and Spanish Patria, the Portuguese Pátria, or the French Patrie. The tradition is simple. You respect your Patria as you would your mother. You would be loyal to your Patria as you would your wife. And you would care for your Patria as you would your daughter.

You see, these stories were allegoric and symbolic. Just as a dragon wasn’t really a dragon but rather a representation of a threat, The Queen or the Princess would a physical manifestation of the Patria. Heroes would set off to save their Patria (Queen) without getting any ideas of becoming kings themselves. Heroes would have to prove their worth before their Patria (Princess) would consider them worthy suitors and heirs to the throne. This is why so many stories are about heroes fighting any threat that would harm their Patria. They weren’t fighting to save a Queen or a Princess. They were fighting to save their country and their homes or to prove their worth to the people as a future king.

Guayabera Achievement Unlocked

La cumbre de la renovación se viste de guayabera. (The Summit of renewal dresses in guayabera.)

Soledad Alvarez

As I research gentleman traditions (and culture in general) I have found how many of the customs and behaviors people assume to be regional, the ones that hold a sense of national pride, are in actuality more global than they like to think. The reality is that globalism isn’t something new. We have been a global community since the invention of travel and commerce. Exchange of customs, knowledge, and traditions were the inevitable side effect of merchants moving from land to land trading their goods. When you realize this and the actual extent of this, you start questioning if your regional pride as a way to feel superior, or at least different from others, is actually valid.

This doubt happened to me some days ago, thanks to spring rolling in.

As the weather started to warm up, I unpacked all the clothing I couldn’t wear due to the climate (damn you cold weather, damn you to…). Among them were my Guayaberas. To me, the guayabera holds a special place as it was the shirts my grandfather always wore. I swear, the only time I saw him dressed in anything else was in an old picture of him dressed in his military dress uniform. To me, the guayabera spoke about old traditions, about my heritage and culture, giving me a sense of regional pride. Now that I know more than I did yesterday? It speaks to me about just how connected we all are as a global community.

Ernest Hemingway.
Don't think I need to say more.

For those who have never heard of a guayabera, this is a traditional cotton or linen shirt worn mostly in the Caribbean and Central America, that has found its way into the global scene. Easily recognizable because of its four front pockets, symmetrical pair of vertical pleating or embroidery across its front and a straight hem meant to be worn untucked. The guayabera has become synonymous with the image of the distinguished Latin American gentleman.

Although the general public might assume the guayabera as a Latin American version of the Hawaiian shirt, this is far from the intended purpose of the shirt. The traditional guayabera’s stylish details have a practical origin as they were intended as shirts for field workers, yet the same design styling would also be used for formal dress shirts. Their regional appeal has lead to a more modern version generally called a tourist guayabera. This one I have to admit is little more than Latin American Hawaiian shirts.

Guava Fruit

As popular as the guayabera might be, its origins have been lost to time as each regional group within the Caribbean tries to take credit for its creation. The most common story, or at least the most vocal one given, places the guayabera’s humble beginnings in the Cuban countryside during the early 18th century.  A poor seamstress sewed four pockets on to the front of her husband’s shirt so he could carry guayabas, known in English as guava fruit.

The Cubans place its origins near the Yayabo River in Sancti Spiritus, where the locals of the area were called Yayabero. This claim is repeated every year on July 1, as the Cuban community worldwide celebrates Guayabera Day. To the Cuban's dismay, the Mexicans claim it started in the Yucatan or Veracruz, as they call it a “Camisa de Yucatan” (Yucatan shirt) or Guayabana, the region’s indigenous word meaning to “throw over.” The shirts relationship with this region and to Merida, a Mexican town famous for its embroidery work, is why some people refer to the guayabera as a “Mexican Wedding Shirt.” 

Barong

Here's where the story becomes more complicated. Some people believe that the guayabera actually had its origin in China, Thailand, or the Philippines as an evolution of the Barong Shirt. The shirt found its way into the Caribbean area either with the Manila-Acapulco galleon trade route of the Spaniards of the early 1800's or massive Chinese migration to Central America and the Caribbean in 1850’s. Still others say that it actually started in Andalucía, Spain, and as it use spread due to merchant routes, it began picking up details and flairs from every region it passed by.

Whatever its birthplace was or who influenced its development, the guayabera’s popularity kept growing throughout the centuries as a functional and stylish dress option to the suite within warm weather climates worldwide. Past its localized appeal, the shirt grew in popularity as Cuban missionaries took the shirt into Africa in the late 19th century and the Caribbean migration to Florida, New York, and some regions of Europe during the Spanish American war of 1898 and the later half of the 20th century. In truth, the big boom of the guayabera happened as the interest in tropical music and Latin culture thanks to that mid-20th century migration, as it gave the guayabera a renewed  worldwide exposure and appeal. Its position within the fashion industry became cemented when in 1967; Perry Ellis International established its business in Miami, making what was considered a niche item into an accessible shirt for a broader audience.

Safari Shirt

Besides being called guayabera or Mexican wedding shirt, it has many names depending on the region in question. In the Dominican Republic, it’s called a Chacabana while in most parts of Europe its simply called  a “Cubana,” a Cuban. A variation of the guayabera gave birth to the “Safari Shirt” in Britain and Zimbabwe, although these are made usually of hemp and cotton, and have a sturdier feel. A similar shirt in Guyana, Trinidad, and the Virgin Islands is called a “Shirt-jac” while in Jamaica it’s known as a bush jacket. In the Samoan islands, the shirt is used as part of the “safari set,” a man’s formal attire.

When you consider the climate of all these areas, it makes perfect sense that the guayabera, with it's light feel and practical elegance, is viewed as the go-to shirt for men who want to distinguish themselves. Political leaders adopted the shirt as the official dress garment as a demonstration of populist ideals, since the suit, is usually viewed as a sign of foreign influence.

Hemingway helping Cooper level-up.

Although in most of the world, the suit is king, in the tropics, for men who want to stand out, the guayabera trumps it. Now that you understand how this shirt is the child of a global exchange of cultures, why not extend this tradition beyond the Hispanic community. Next time the weather is hot and your attitude is hotter, when you want to stand out triumphant over the sea of Navy Blues and Ties, why not pull a Hemmingway. Sometimes you have to level-up past the suit, and unlock the Guayabera.

Old Traditions And New Worlds

Learn the rules like a pro, so you can break them like an artist.

Pablo Picasso

Many of those who read my posts comment and compliment my support to the old traditions and old virtues of life. Some of those who don’t agree with me do so under the ideals that change is inevitable and that we must cast aside old traditions to give way to a better future. So…Who is right? Is the older generation’s support of time tested traditions better? Or is it the younger generation’s desire to bravely go into uncharted lands better?

If I am to be completely honest, I have to say both.

Life is the result of a constant evolution, redefinition, and reinvention. But this isn’t about change for change’s sake. It’s about understanding why things were done in a specific way and why they worked. Then, and only then, can we try to change them, or at least develop them into something more. Old isn’t always right and New isn’t always better.

Doing something in a specific way simply because “that’s the way it’s always done” is the worst reason imaginable to do it that way. We must always try to consider why it was done that way. And usually there is a very good reason behind it, and that’s why we keep doing the same thing over and over.

The older generation needs to understand that change has been a constant in life, and they don’t need to feel threatened by it. Things no longer useful should be discarded as they only serve to hold us back.

Changing something simply because “change is good” is also the worst reason why things might need change. Dismissing the old simply because it’s old is literally ignoring all our previous experience and knowledge before making a decision.  

The younger generation needs to understand that they are no more special than every single generation that came before them. Things that work shouldn’t be discarded, but rather improved upon. And we can only do this after we learn and understand them.

We need to understand traditions but we also need to understand the need to challenge them. Only when something has stood against being challenged can it be of any true value to you. There needs to be a balance between the old and the new within your life. Only when you appreciate what has come before you can you move on.

Chivalry, Far From Dead.

The simple act of paying attention can take you a long way.

Keanu Reeves

Usually I am careful when I use the word Chivalry in a post because this specific word carries a lot of preconceived weight from the reader. When I use the term chivalry, the reader’s own prejudice, based mostly on misunderstandings the concept by some who executed it or by someone who observed it, tend to overwhelm their capacity to view things with an open mind. This becomes evident with men “acting” chivalrous expecting something in return or due to their own sexist attitude. We also see this prejudice present in both women or men who assume these acts, even when done for the right reason, carry a sense of “benevolent sexism” where each gender blames the other for the causes and results of such acts. To both groups I just have one thing to say:

Get over yourself.

It isn’t that chivalry is now a rare thing. You have to understand that it never was that common to begin with. Knightly Chivalry was a thing left only to the knights, the elite warrior class. Noble Chivalry was left only to the nobility. And now Gentlemen Chivalry is something done by Gentlemen. Not everyone is willing to be a Gentleman, so not everyone should be expected to be chivalrous. And that’s ok, because not everyone is really willing to put the effort in leading a less than ordinary life. This is a choice people have to make on their own. 

But there are those who still do expect more from themselves. You see this every day in the random event done without making a big deal about them. There is no bowing, no “milady”, no drama. Just a simple act done in a simple way. And this is the true sign of a Gentleman, those who’s acts of chivalry are as natural to them as breathing is to other men. You see it in the man holding a door open for others simply for no other reason than because he can. You see it in the man who unconsciously walks on the outside of the sidewalk. And you see it in the man who offers his seat in a train, no matter how well known and influential he is.