Don’t tell me what’s wrong with the world…

In order to change the world, you have to get your head together first.

Jimi Hendrix

So, you logged in this morning, and already have seen 20 posts of what’s wrong with this world. Every social media outlet has people screaming left and right how everything everyone is doing is wrong, how the world need to change, and that’s without going into the comment sections… and yet how many of these posts mention something about what kind of world would be better?

Very few. We have become a society of opposing politicians yelling the world about what the other is doing wrong. The problem with men is this, the problem with women is that. Look at what this social group is doing, look at what that religion promotes, condemn what the other country does. And yet we do so little to define what we proposes as an alternative.

I love history because it lets you see how peoples actions create change. During my youth, I studied an event within the University of Havana. In 1947, a group of students, challenging the conservative society they lived in, broke into the Library and burned several copies of ‘Vignola,’ a classical book on design. And you would think that this would usher a new modern era for society, based on the idea of the ‘Tabula Rasa.’. The reality was that 10 years later, the only thing that really changed in Cuba was who was in charge, and society didn’t get any better.

The great people who want to change the world do so thinking of what world they want to create. This way they can actually consider what changes they want to apply, what work they need to do. They can work to change what doesn’t work for that new world, and make better what does.

What they don’t do is believe that scrapping everything leads to anything good. What they can't see is how scrapping everything leads to scrapping the few good things we have done also.

Every time you call out for a revolution based on the idea that what is now is wrong, it’s only a call to those who don’t agree with what’s there, for whatever their own reasons. “Change the world to make it better for me” is the usual sentiment you can take from their reasons for change.  Other times they just want to vent their frustration and anger, get even for wrongs done to them. It’s not about making a better world, but about a Vendetta.

So before you rant online, consider your dream. Define your vision. Stop telling me what’s wrong with the world and let’s start talking about what kind of world we want to create.

The Guy You Used To Be...

 It’s not about the Guy you used to be, but the Gentleman you’ve become.

Being Caballero's Motto

If you’re reading this, means you’ve seen this phrase in all my cover images. And you might think it’s a rather cool phrase, somewhat catchy, and just leave it at that. The reality behind it is probably the biggest challenge every man trying to better himself has to face, living past the man they used to be.

People might say that they live in the present, or that the actions they do today define who they are. But the truth is that we live in a society that reinforces shame and guilt, a society that will try to make you small because of the man you used to be. And it will remind you everything you have done wrong every time you start to do better. Be it your acquaintances, your friends, your spouse, or even worse, yourself, someone will drag out your past mistakes and failures to bring you down. That shame of who you were, and that fear that you will never live down your past, is usually what keeps you from moving forward.

An even more dangerous attitude is accepting these past sins as what defines you. “This is who I am. You don’t like it, F.U.” Really? You don’t even like yourself and want to change, so why start lying to yourself just because others would rather bring you down and limit yourself. Why let their attitude empower them by depowering you?

Here’s the reality. Life is like a Credit Card. You do bad things; you don’t pay them at that time. But that debt is there, and creates interest. And just when things start to turn around, as you start to make life work, the collection agencies will start knocking at your door. That is how Karma works. So treat it like a collection agency. Accept your responsibility, deal with your debt, and accept the interest it accumulated. That is part of the process to make your life right.

Now, as with collection agencies that get overzealous and greedy, learn when to give yourself enough respect and learn when to tell them “No.” Don’t give them power over your life. These people thrive on making others miserable, and will feed of your guilt, many times unfounded guilt. Becoming a Better Man is hard enough without having to add people trying to sabotage your life.

Give yourself value. Sure, you might have messed up; you might have strayed from your path. That’s not being a bad person, it’s called being human. Stand up, brush it off and move forward. Just don’t think you won’t have to pay back that debt with interest. Respect yourself enough to move forward. Don’t let anyone stop you, especially yourself.