Showing posts with label honesty. Show all posts
Showing posts with label honesty. Show all posts

2/27/16

Be Wary of Sheep in Wolf's Clothing


In order to be an immaculate member of a flock of sheep, one must above all be a sheep oneself.
Albert Einstein
We've all heard the old adage, "Be wary of sheep in wolf's clothing." If for some reason you haven't, it's a biblical warning about people hiding their true nature. "Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves." (Matthew 7:15) It's used to describe those playing a role contrary to their real character, one who hides how dangerous they truly are and how they work off other people’s trusting nature, leading them to a certain demise. Today our challenge seems to be quite the opposite, as we praise the wolf and disdain the sheep.

We, in our ego driven need to stand out, try our best to not become sheep. Society tells us that, in order to be successful, we need to become wolves, so we are fed motivational meme after meme relating to the badassery of the noble wolves and wolf packs. Maybe this has been an indirect result of "gritty is cool" or "idealism is for kids," yet the direct result is how people are flocking to become pseudo-rebels who "challenge the establishment." These men and women model themselves to fit the expectations of the crowd as they regurgitate what that same crowd fed them in the first place. We used to see it in people taking actions simply for the amusement and validation of their friends. Today, with social media, it has become increasingly worse. They work off "like" and "share" of complete strangers, where their followers tell the "wolf" what to say and do, as they become little more than another sheep in a flock.

How often, in your attempt to be your own person, are you simply following the crowd? How often are you playing the bad boy just for the approval of others? Is their approval more important than the people you're hurting, so often simply to prove how badass you are? Harder to recognize still, but just as dangerous to yourself, how often you take a contrary stance to the crowd just to play the rebel? Isn't the crowd still telling you what to do? Are you viewing the crowd's reactions of approval or disapproval as a validation of your actions, instead of using the actual repercussions as a true measure?

In your attempt to prove how secure you are, have you become that insecure?

That's why social media is sometimes a dangerous place. Anyone can present themselves as a leader, an influencer, as everyone tries to market themselves as the protagonist of their own novel. In reality they're just rehashing the same thing everyone else is doing. If they don't keep their egos in check, or at least are honest enough with themselves to understand why they're doing something, they'll easily fall prey to the comfort of the approval of the masses as the final goal becomes being "liked" by “friends.”

Consider that person you follow and respect. Are you following them because they have something to contribute to your lives or are you following them simply because they validate your own prejudice? Gravitate to those who can make you grow and open your eyes. Do so, not to follow them, but rather to learn from them, as you become your own person. And above all, be careful that in your desperate need to become a wolf, you don't become a sheep.

9/8/15

A Magnificent Bastard



If you're a wolf, be a wolf… Real men don't play games or need to lie in order to get something from a woman. Man up. Be honest. Be real and make your intentions for the relationship clear from the beginning.
Brandon Alexander, New Age Gents
When you think of a Gentleman, you think of a good man who’s dedicated to positive endeavors, has impeccable manners, dresses to impress, and has sworn his undying love to a single person. This is true, that man probably is a Gentleman, but not all gentlemen are like that.

I have met gentlemen who don’t focus on social justice, they just make sure not to hurt others and that’s more than enough for them. I have met gentlemen who don’t know the nuances of social etiquette, yet their attention for others more than compensate for that lack of education. I have met blue collar gentlemen, and have met gents who have no interest in establishing any formal relationship. I have even met gentlemen who exemplify the Gentleman-Rogue, and being a rogue doesn’t make them any less of a gentleman. Gentlemen are defined by their honorable acts and honesty of self, so how can you say that a man who is open and honest about not being a “good” man be considered any less of a gentleman?

All too often men assume that they have to lie about who they are, as they walk around as wolves in sheep’s clothing. They assume that they must play “the game” as the only way to live is by manipulating others. Many actually believe they ARE good men, rationalizing why they would stab someone in the back.

But what if you didn’t need to stab someone in the back, to manipulate others, to live a hypocritical “good” life, one you truly don’t believe in? Doing good acts that you don’t believe in, just to impress others is, in truth, lying to those around you. That’s little more than an open manipulation of those around you. Why not simply be honest? Why not drop the sheep’s cloak and be the man you are?

This attitude is nothing new as every society has had its share of Gentlemen Rogues and Lotharios who live under an informal code based on the ideals of “Honor among Thieves.” Not every man is looking to save the world nor is looking for the love of his life. Some men are just looking to carve a nook for themselves and those around them. Some men are just looking to find that special person for that one night. Some men who think like this have the balls to be honest about it.

And isn’t that in a way respectable? No games, nor lies, just a wolf who isn’t ashamed of being a wolf. A man who will openly speak of his intentions, one who lays his cards on the table, one who isn’t afraid standing before you with a sword drawn when he calls you out, one who openly speaks his mind. In a way, these men are viewed as a lot more dangerous by society, as they let everyone know about another way of living, as they have little interests in impressing others as they live in honest addition of who they are, while holding themselves up to a strict personal code of honor. These are the men who are wrong in all the right ways. People might think of them as bastards, but they are Magnificent Bastards.